Bob Sagat = funny. No, we're being serious.

We'd always assumed, when we heard tales that Bob Saget was really a foul-mouthed bastard behind the "Full House" rictus smile, that it was a sort of grand pop culture urban legend. But a quick search of Snopes.com for La Saget only turns up this old rumor (Status: Undetermined) about Alanis Morissette and Dave Coulier.

Apparently, in "The Aristocrats," that Sundance doc of dozens of famous comedians telling the same dirty vaudeville joke, each giving it their own personal touches (we've linked to this before, but here is a video clip of the "South Park" rendition, which is apparently also included in the film, and which, unless you have headphones or an extremely tolerant office, is NSFW), Saget manages to come up with one of the filthiest versions in the film.

Saget's in New York doing an off-Broadway play, "Privilege," which was written by Paul Weitz, director of "American Pie" and "About a Boy." He gives an interview in the New York Observer about the play, and about having made a career based on pretending to be squeaky clean.

In comedy circles, there’s a famous Saget story about the night his first daughter was born. After a very difficult birth, during which Sherri Saget and her baby almost died, a friend showed up to find Mr. Saget looking utterly destroyed, unshaven, unrecognizable, but holding his newborn.

"Oh my God, Bob, she's beautiful," the friend said.

"For a dollar, you can finger her," Mr. Saget replied.

"This story continually comes back to me," he said, groaning. "Oh boy, I was a wreck,  and I was just operating on whatever sick mode I'm always in anyway. I don't remember, but I don't think a dollar is enough money for something that crosses the line that much. I would have said $5."

Having watched far too much of Saget being the only one laughing at his own terrible, cheesy jokes on "America's Funniest Home Videos" as a young 'un, we're still a little in shock from the interview. But you should certainly read it. And "The Aristocrats" is being released by ThinkFilm, NY/LA July 29th, limited nationwise August 12th.

You know who else is funny? That Stephen Colbert. The New York Times reports on how he's getting his own fake cable news show to follow "The Daily Show," in the style of "The O'Reilly Factor": "It will be called 'The Colbert Report' - though, if Mr. Colbert has his way, the announcer will pronounce it with a faux-French accent: The co-BEAR ra-PORE."

+ Bob Saget’s Full Mouth (NY Observer)
+ 'Daily Show' Personality Gets His Own Platform (NY Times)